Ephesians 6:1-4 (KJV) 

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honor thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; that it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth. And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”

As most of you may know we have a rather large family, eleven children with number twelve on the way. I remember when we first started our family receiving comments from so many different people all echoing the same forecast, “Ah, wait until they become teenagers!”

 Our oldest child has made the teenage years appear to be harmless, if not entirely enjoyable until most recently. Now I am beginning to feel the weight and reality of those warnings and wonder what have we done. 

All joking aside, it is an interesting time for both parent and child as children begin to test the waters of this life, and as we learn to do more releasing and surrendering. Our daughter who once joyfully followed through with our advice now questions it greatly and even leans a little outside of our bounds. There was an interesting season where she would even give us lip service and agree that we were right, only to go and do the very thing we agreed was wrong. I can no longer say that I am loving this season that has fast approached us, but I am enjoying what I am learning through it all and how it is helping me to look at my younger children in a different light. 

Ephesians chapter 6 addresses the children first, telling them that they should obey their parents in the Lord for that is right. It goes on to further instruct them to show their parents honor for this is the first commandment with a promise - that it will go well for them and they will live long. The next verse addresses the parents saying that they should not provoke their children to wrath, but rather bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. 

One of the definitions for wrath is vengeful anger. If you seek vengeance, it is because you feel you have been wronged. We are told not to provoke our children to this kind of behavior. How would we do that? Maybe it means giving them a voice and not just talking at them. Maybe it could be that we need to treat them with human dignity, the way that we would want to be treated. The character traits we desire in our children we should ourselves exhibit - honesty, humility, respect. 

What would it look like to nurture our children in the Lord? How do you nurture anything? You give it the right nutrients it needs to grow; you protect it from harsh elements, you take the time to care for it. The word admonish means to give a gentle or friendly rebuke. Now the word rebuke implies that there would be a standard you uphold, but it's how you present that standard. Isn’t it the kindness of the Lord that leads us to repentance? Surely, we need the wisdom of the Lord in every season of parenting.  

Let me end with a prayer….

Father, help us to love like Your love, to have a vision for our family and wisdom on how to follow through with that vision. It is our desire to do your will. We desire to keep our children’s hearts and to care and nurture them in you. Show us more clearly what that looks like, and Holy Spirit reminds us when we deviate from your path. Bless our communication with our children and help us to take seriously the souls that you have entrusted in our care we ask in Jesus’ name, amen.