An illustration the Holy Spirit taught me to use to help those who struggle to understand our individual relationship with Him is this: We invite Him to come into our house, and we treat Him as our honored guest. Yet because He is our guest, we tell Him, “Do not touch, do not get involved, and do not work or serve in our house.” Because of that, the only communication we have with Him happens when we recognize that He is still sitting there, waiting for us to engage with Him.

Does this somehow apply to your marriage? Or is there only a one-way frequency, FM or AM? Have you tuned in? Have you paid attention?

I have realized how grateful I am that the Lord gave me a husband who does his best to take care of me. Sometimes he may miss the mark. Well, just as we sometimes miss the mark in serving the Lord. Sometimes we are supposed to serve Him wholeheartedly, yet we give only halfheartedly. We should be His sheep and listen to His voice, yet sometimes we do not pay attention or we fail to follow.

How does Jesus respond to all of these behaviors as the Good Shepherd? He calls again. He reaches out again. He does not yell. He does not continually repeat our wrongs. He does not give up. He is patient, and He is present.

We are definitely not Jesus, but we are called to become more like Him. The fault may belong to your spouse this time, but not every time. He or she may miss the mark this time, but not every time. Tiredness may cause him or her to become quiet this time, but not every time.

If our beautiful Bridegroom, who is holy, remains present at all times—in our highs and our lows, in the times when we are loving and kind and even in the times when we are not—what should we do in our marriages? Be present, be patient, and show grace in each other’s shortcomings.

Being present can become the same as being absent if we have zero engagement with one another. If this is not Jesus’ design for His relationship with His Church, then it should not be right for a husband and wife either.

Life may be challenging. Time may be limited. Disagreements and mistakes may happen. Be present with a joyful heart anyway. When you do, you may discover the beautiful difference that simply being present can bring to your marriage.